Is Lawyer Stress Threatening Your Well-Being?

Are the long hours, highly-competitive work environment, and the expectation to be perfect finally getting to you? Are you taking the work stress home where it is causing problems with your spouse and family? Perhaps you lash out at your partner or children because there is no outlet for your frustration at work. Conversely, maybe you are burying all of that stress, resulting in digestive issues, high blood pressure, a compromised immune system, alcohol/substance use, or even an early heart attack.

Work-related stress affects many individuals, but for lawyers, it can be especially impactful, even if you feel that law is your calling.  If you never liked practicing law, the impact can be even worse. Dealing with the psychological battering of opposing counsel and difficult judges, bad reviews by clients, and the vicarious trauma of witnessing other people’s suffering can be draining on your soul. You likely feel obligated to continue shouldering this burden as part of the job—what has been called “paid worries”—but the hopelessness and powerlessness are devolving into anxiety, depression, or work burnout. Similarly, the lack of personal or family time may be causing you to consider changing careers, but you don’t want to sacrifice your earning potential. You are caught in the “golden handcuffs.”

I understand just how demanding it can be to work in the legal system; however, you don’t have to navigate the stress on your own. With my help, you can learn to separate yourself from work, identify what you need to truly be happy, and find a way to improve your situation.

Practicing Law Is One Of The Most Stressful Occupations In The US

Many legal professionals grow emotionally and physically exhausted from their work. For a majority of lawyers, this change occurs after ten years of practice. The responsibilities of starting a family, raising children, and tending to personal lives add additional layers of stress that simply weren’t there during law school. It’s also at this point when lawyers begin to realize that their goal of saving the world one person at a time isn’t as practical or achievable as once thought. Instead, they usually find that the glamor of practicing law, as portrayed in film and television, is wildly out of sync with the gritty reality of being a lawyer.

The constant stream of emotionally taxing court cases, the crucial demands for perfection, and the insistence on solving everyone’s problems slowly begin to erode at a person’s relationships, personal health, and even their sense of identity. But often, lawyers don’t see the obvious signs of burnout.

Unfortunately, research indicates that practicing law is, in fact, one of the most stressful jobs in the US, and the resulting internal conflict and work fatigue contribute to a variety of physical and mental health concerns. According to a 2016 study of lawyer impairment conducted by the American Bar Association’s Commission on Lawyer Assistance Programs and the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, over 20 percent of respondents reported problematic drinking patterns that could lead to addiction. Moreover, nearly half of those who participated reported experiencing depression at some point in their career. And a whopping 61 percent of respondents said that they had dealt with anxiety as well.

I understand it may seem as if you don’t have any choice but to stay where you are, both professionally and mentally, but there are steps you can take to protect yourself and your career. With my help, you can learn how to prevent burnout, take better care of yourself, and create options for moving forward.

Individual Psychotherapy Can Give You Space To Think And Breathe

The wonderful thing about psychotherapy is that it gives you permission to be human and embrace your imperfections, vulnerability, and your full range of emotions. It offers you guidance for increasing resilience, improving communication skills, and connecting to something greater than your job.

In a safe and confidential space, I’ll encourage you to talk about your challenges openly with the goal of identifying and understanding any internal conflicts you may be experiencing. In the process, we will attempt to get to the root of any unresolved personal issues that may be triggered by work stresses and reframe negative thoughts that may be causing self-destructive behaviors. I’ll also strive to help you build your emotional intelligence so you can increase your resilience and regulate your response to stress better. With your commitment, you can learn how to be more autonomous, authentic, and confident. At the same time, you can begin to repair aspects of your relationship or personal health that have been damaged by the nature of your work.

My approach to healing is both insight- and problem-oriented, focusing on helping you understand and overcome the motivation behind your thoughts and emotions. I can teach you mindfulness meditation and self-regulation strategies that can help you better compartmentalize issues so that you can concentrate on one thing at a time. I also give you tools to enable greater introspection and self-awareness, allowing you to analyze and work on yourself independently outside of sessions.

I understand that you may feel depleted right now, but I can show you how to prevent burnout and protect your job—as well as your health—in the long-run. Conversely, if you need a way out, we can explore options for teaching, going corporate, starting your own practice, transitioning to a smaller firm or leaving the legal profession altogether.

During my time as a therapist, I have spoken at Bar Associations and legal groups, tailor-made and conducted resilience building workshops for lawyers, and written numerous articles on the subject of lawyer burnout. With a little time and commitment, I believe that you can find greater fulfillment in helping others, as well as satisfaction in yourself.

Perhaps you’re considering professional counseling for lawyer stress but still have some concerns...

I worry about what people will think if they find out I am in therapy.

Some lawyers are so afraid of people knowing they are in therapy that they feel even their insurance carrier will divulge that fact to their employers. In all my years of practicing psychotherapy, I have never seen it happen.

More than likely, you are experiencing lawyer burnout as a personal failure and feel that admitting vulnerability is a weakness.  Nothing could be further from the truth. The legal profession is still a macho culture and many lawyers get caught up in it in insidious ways.  Once you can understand that the culture of the psychological profession is the opposite and that psychotherapy is a safe space in which you can be yourself without judgment, you can begin dealing with stress and building resilience in a way that makes your more confident, effective and at peace.

How long will therapy take?

If occupational stress were the main culprit, then simply providing you with coping skills would solve the problem. Usually, however, work stresses are triggering early traumatic experiences, family expectations, and unresolved prior issues. Chances are good you didn’t arrive at this page thinking there were easy answers. If you want to figure out how you arrived at lawyer burnout, what you really want to do, and how to get there, it will take some time. But professional counseling will be well worth the investment; it offers you sustainable healing that can improve your personal well-being, relationships and social life, and long-term career goals well beyond our time together.

What if reducing stress hurts my drive and intensity?

Some stress can be motivating, so I don’t want to take that away from you. However, too much worry reduces productivity and can harm the very aspects of your life that you are trying to enjoy and prosper from. When you learn to use emotional intelligence, you will become more flexible, accommodating, and self-nurturing in work and life—and far more successful in both.

You are your organization’s most valuable asset; therefore, taking care of your mental and physical health can only help your career, not hurt it.

Don’t Let The Job Become Your Life

If you need assistance avoiding burnout, or if you would like to transition out of your old career, I can help. Please call 646-620-9940 for your free 15-minute phone consultation. If you would like to know more about the signs and symptoms of lawyer stress, click here for a blog on the subject.

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